There are all types of relationships. Mother-Daughter. Father-Son. Siblings. Friends. Lovers. Business. Pleasure. Cousins. Aunts. Uncles. Grandparents. In-laws. Teachers. Loving from afar. Girlfriends. Boyfriends. Marriages. Dating. Recently, I’ve been thinking about relationships, and how they directly shape and influence our daily lives. I’ve come to the conclusion that everything boils down to a relationship and the relationship rules that guide that interaction. The below realizations apply to all types of relationships:
1. Our similarities bring us comfort, but our differences makes us who we are. We are not always going to agree on everything. In fact, who would want that really? The simple fact alone that I am different from the people I love proves that the love is real. Regardless of my bad days or silly ideas or crazy theories, these people remain. Because, hey, “That’s just Sheena!”
2. Patience with others is Love. Patience with self is Hope. Patience with God is Faith. The key word here being: Patience. Every relationship is going to have its curve balls and mountains. There will be times when your emotions roll down the wrong road, or the person you care for is on a different path. Patience, breathing, never giving up allows that person, and yourself, to grow and see the big picture.
3. A man who treats his woman like a princess is proof that he has been born & raised in the arms of a queen. Appreciating family and others’ families open a world of opportunities and possibilities for more love. Lessons are passed on through families and hugs and appreciation. Our families make us who we are. Share that.
4. Don’t make decisions when you’re extra angry, and don’t make promises when you’re extra happy. In other words, don’t fight dirty. Be aware of your emotions and your decisions. Relationships are strong, so they are meant to pull people through, but they aren’t meant to be battered and disrespected.
5. You can’t talk your way out of a situation that you behaved yourself into. Actions in a relationship build trust (or non-trust). Remember you aren’t the only one in a relationship. There are always other factors. When you throw a rock in a pond, it leaves ripples that go on and change the surface.
6. Love is when you take away the feeling, the passion, the romance and you find out you still care for that person. Life is going to throw a lot of challenging things at any type of relationship. The tests will try to strip all of the joy from the relationship, but if through it all you can look at them and think, “I still care…” then it’s real, it’s worth fighting for, it’s worth being patient for.
7. When the I in “I love you” becomes more important than the “you,” the word in the middle just fades away. Try very hard to not let your ego, insecurities, needs, wants, demands interfere with your relationships. Stay open minded, trust, give time, believe and most of all always believe in the factors of the relationship.
8. We need each other to have, to hold. It’s true. Can you live without a touch? A hug? A moment of care? Comfort from a parent or a friend? A puppy’s snuggling? I can’t. I need my family, my boyfriend, my boyfriend’s family, my puppy.
9. Take the time to figure them out. Make time in your schedule to learn who you love and who they love. You will end up blessed.
10. The person for you is the one who pushes your buttons, makes you mad on a regular basis and makes you face your issues head-on. I am thankful for the people who bring me back to earth when I’ve lost it somewhere in outer space. I’m thankful for a mother who has always kept me grounded and helped me focus my over-dramatic dreams. These are people who were put in my life for a reason, and it’s for those frustrating reasons that I love them and need them.
The truth is… you just cannot give up. You cannot use “let’s break up” as a way to hurt the person you love. You can’t spit terrible words then run away. You can’t discredit their feelings. You can’t pretend it doesn’t matter to you. They do matter. They always will whether you believe that or not. Relationships are with us always, and they stay right here in our daily lives providing opportunities of growth, celebrating the wins, supporting through the lows. They lift us up, they knock us down, they chip away at us to make us a more perfect version of ourselves. Never forget who loves you, and never forget to love them.